i've always knew this day would come and i've been preparing for a while now, but i realize i'll never be prepared enough to lose someone.

there's this hollow feeling 24/7, it doesn't stop when i eat, sleep, shower, it has no boundaries whatsoever. no matter how much i try to get rid of that someone from my mind they stay, even when i'm laughing, talking with my friends. there hasn't been even one second that i don't think about said person.

it's even harder at night. i keep spacing out, my brain playing a flashback montage of us,

us strolling around the city at night,

us hugging outside my friend's house,

us playing around by pushing each other,

just us being happy.

i keep finding myself click on the gallery app on my phone, scrolling down til' i find an album named after them, and staring at pics & vids contained like a fool. 

and just lay there, crying, clutching my chest, hoping it can somehow heal the heart-wrenching pain i'm feeling throughout the body.

heartbreaks have never been nice to me, but this one's the worst. because at any moment, anywhere, the stuffy feeling comes once in a while.

i want to be fine again.